Change

Man, it has been so very long, that I'm not even sure where to begin. The last post I did was in March and I didn't even have a job and I was single, still living a block from my parents. I surely can't begin a post without a wonderful picture of Emmy :-)

I started working at Trumann Animal Clinic a week after that post. I had worked there through high school and two of my aunts work there and have for years and years. After being there only a few weeks, I found where God had been pulling me to. I now know that being in the Veterinary world is my career, I have been scoping out colleges to attend online to become a licensed Veterinary Assistant. Right now I am a trained technician, and have tons of on the job training and knowledge, but I want the initials behind my name.

Also in my last post, I was single. I battled with God for a long time, wondering why, wondering what I needed to do and where He was leading me. I finally just let go. I was to a point where I had finally decided that I wanted what God wanted, and ONLY what He wanted for my life. That He had mine and Emmy's best interest at heart, and if I could trust God with my eternity, then why couldn't I trust him with my love life and future?? On May 14th, I went out with friends and had a complete blast. Ran into Jason there where he cried his heart out to me, and I didn't believe him. In fact I wiped his tears away and turned him down. I went back with my friends and tried to put the scene behind me, but something kept telling me to listen to him.

So later in the evening when he found me again, I listened. He told me that God had changed him, and that he understood if I didn't want anything to do with him, but that he was sorry and wanted to be in Emmy's life and for things to be different. I decided to see what change he was talking about, I was leery and scared and very un-trusting, but the next day I went with him to visit Emmy.

Just the scene alone of seeing him with Emmy would melt anyone's heart. He ran for her, she ran for him and they both cried and cried. He apologized to me, apologized to Emmy, even apologized to his family and also to mine. He begged to attend church with me, and begged to be in our lives. I always said that God would show me that He had changed him. And He did. Jason would have to be a complete different person for me to want him in my life, and he was; in all aspects.

I can not begin to tell you the joy that God has brought to my life. Knowing he answered my prayers for Jason and my prayers for my life. For once in my life, I knew I was doing what He wanted me to do.

Needless to say, I relocated to Newport, AR where Jason was managing a store of his own. I drove back and forth an hour away to my job daily and brought Emmy to see my family. On Sundays we would make the drive to church and for a day with family. The happiest I have ever been in life has been in the last 3 months. I have been so very blessed.

We had a small bump in our way...we both missed home and felt like God was leading us away from Newport and back to home. Jason had lunch on August 9th with a competitor seeking a position closer to home. He turned it down because he didn't feel God's leading and we were going to patiently wait on God's door to open. However, on August 10, Jason was fired. His manager came in and asked him to resign before being fired. Jason said no, he could fire him that he had done nothing wrong. So they did. In Arkansas you can be fired for anything. And it stinks! So we have been looking for a place to live back home and also a job for Jason. He has put in many many applications and called and called.

So while that storm has been raging, many of you that have me on Facebook know what happened on Monday August, 29th. I had just left for work and was traveling on a straight highway at 70 or 75 mph. Yes that's speeding, supposed to be 55, but its a straight road, paved and not highly traveled. I take it twice a day going to and from work. Emmy and I were both buckled in, and enjoying KLove and admiring God's beauty. She was looking for crop-dusters and I was enjoying the sunrise.

A rabbit ran from the opposite lane towards me and I instinctively pulled to the right away from it. As I did my right front tire went off the road into the gravel. I immediately corrected it and when I did, the back tire caught the gravel and spun us. So I corrected again, causing way too much correction. My two right tires came off the road and we headed for the ditch.

I didn't hit my brakes because I knew we would flip on the pavement and I knew we wouldn't survive. So we hit a ditch at 75 miles per hour. Over 200 feet of pure horror. Emmy's screams will be forever etched in my mind and the feeling of being thrown back and forth and hanging upside down with no control. I know I blacked out for a few rolls. When I came to, we were landing, and we stopped upside down. My leg was hung near the windshield (keep in mind we were upside down...) and as I pushed off of the windshield, I noticed it was cracked and gave to my weight and there was water in the ditch. I unbuckled myself and crawled out of my window and then crawled into Emmy's window to get her loose from her seat. Her booster seat held by the adult seatbelt held and did it's job through 9 rolls. Yes I said 9. We were air born at least 2 or 3 times from the marks in the grass. Emmy's head was all that was hurt, she had 2 scrapes, and was well. She never went into shock and was so wonderful! A school bus saw what happened and the driver called 911 for us. 5 minutes later the fire department responded along with police and a state trooper and also a wrecker to tow my car.

I didn't make them put Emmy on a back restraint because she was walking, talking and could move everything with no other scrapes or anything. She answered their questions and watched as they put me on a back board and braced me down. She never once cried or whined or threw a fit or was scared of the men or the ambulance. The police woke Jason up and he met us at the hospital emergency room. After being xrayed and having scans of our heads, we were released. Only needed a neck brace and an arm sling and some pain meds, I'd say that we came out on the good end of the deal, and after you see the car, I think you will agree!

Have you ever felt like you had been prepared to die? This may sound like a crazy question for a 23 year old mom. But seriously... let me explain.

As I said, Jason and I have been amazing. I mean that with all my heart. I can't even tell you how wonderful our life is together and how wonderful being a family in God is. Praying and reading the bible, attending church and tithing, believing and trusting...just being ONE in God!!! So anyways, Sunday was spent in church and with our family, lunch and shopping, then church again. We had Communion Sunday night and on the drive home Jason and I had a long talk about our life, our future, our Christian walk, just about everything. Monday when I woke up, I got up  and got ready, then got Emmy ready and we kissed Jason goodbye. It was a different kind of kiss, the kind that keeps you lingering and makes you late for work, the kind where you want to cherish the moment. When I put Emmy in her seat, I belted her up and pulled it tight as always and I kissed her and told her I loved her like I do to make her giggle as we leave. And then as we started our trip, I turned on Christian music and Emmy and I started our day. We talked about God's beauty with the sun coming up and how pretty the clouds were, and she was asking if there were airplanes out yet. A couple of my friends had text me telling me to have a great day and that they loved me. And I had just seen my parents the day before. Hugged them both...I was prayed up and ready. So I'd say this is an unusual experience. Where Emmy and I traveled with God over 200 feet and flipped 9 times and not only survived but walked away with only minor cuts, bruises, and scrapes. God was my pilot. My air bags never deployed. Just think, If I had been going any slower or any faster, I would have hit poles on either end. If they had flushed the rice fields, then the ditch would have been full of water and we might have drowned. If my car had crushed, If Emmy had slid out of her seat or either of our belts had ripped. If the windshield had given way and sprayed glass into me. If the windows hadn't of busted out and we had no way to get out. Too many what if's, but all I know is that God is real. He has been real. He has answered prayers, saved Jason, gave me my family back in ways I couldn't have dreamed of. He has give us a new life and been providing for us in time of need, and here we are trusting him even more to take care of us. If He can save us and keep us here for another purpose, then I can Praise HIM!!!!!

I will post again soon!
Jess